On Tuesday of this week, I had an endoscopy to take a look and see how bad my esophagitis has gotten and if I have Barretts as I have had soo much pain in my throat and chest when swallowing and burning in my mouth and throat. The doctor said it didn’t look like I have anything serious, but my esophagus and stomach were very red. She also removed a polyp I had on a part of my stomach and took a few tissue samples to send to the lab along with the polyp to rule out Barretts, Heliobacter pylori and celiac disease.
I came home and pretty much worked all day and Wednesday I worked on my laptop in bed because I felt like poo. Later in the evening since my brother really wanted the annual fresh pies I made the pie crusts from scratch (which I really should have done a few days earlier) which delayed the process of getting the pies done so we ended up finishing everything at 3am (we started late too)
Today has been rough. I did help very little with Turkey prep but after slept for a few hours as my body just couldn’t go on. Then when dinner time rolled around, the pain from swallowing was bad in my throat and chest and I figured, no Thanksgiving dinner for me this year. I did try, but it was just too much discomfort. I have already lost about 4 pounds from not eating much but what can you do? I excused myself from the table and went to lie down.
After about another hour, I went back to the kitchen and gave it another try. Fortunately this time after drinking cold water with almost each bite, I was able to tolerate eating a little bit and that is something. For dessert? No cakes, no pies, just a few cookies and a few Wise brand cheetos and water.
But enough of the heavy, it’s Thanksgiving and I’ve done a lot of work over the past few weeks in trying to change the way I look at things… soooo What am I thankful for? My mom, brother and those that have supported me along my journey this year. I’m grateful I am alive and have a job, a home and that I was able to go to Comic Con this year. I can walk again and I found a few new doctors (my primary doc, gastro doc, urogyno, urologist) that have helped me instead of gaslighting me with the health issues that have plagued me this year. I do have a lot to be thankful for and while this year Thanksgiving is sucky, and I’ve been hungry a lot these past few weeks, I have faith that things will get better.
It’s all about focusing on the positive and not letting the negative drag me down in the gutters of depression as they have time and time again in past years. It’s also about reminding myself that my journey to health isn’t race, it’s about taking baby steps without judgment and criticism.
As far as Thanksgiving. Since I missed eating whole turkey, rice and the fixings this year, I have a goal to make a small Thanksgiving dinner in the coming months, whenever I heal enough to eat again and celebrate that little win.
I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!!!
Until tomorrow my phoenixes!!! Never Give Up and Be Kind To Yourself!!!
Mind Body Synergylia 