With Comic Con around the corner (next Thursday 10/09 through Sunday 10/12 to be exact), I was getting super excited after feeling the fog lifting and feeling a bit more strength in my body. Last night the downturn began again. The addition of my esophagitis worries came back like a boomerang. I was getting a sore throat and what seems like a blister in the back of my throat when I had some watered down ginger ale to ease the nausea I was getting. This has come and gone in the past few months, but now it seems to be hanging around a lot longer which is a bit unnerving since there are stages of esophagitis and each stage is worse. Up until this point, I have been doing all natural things to heal my esophagus since the medication I was prescribed, Omeprazole and Pantoprazole had bad side effects. What’s even more disheartening is the doctors I have been to have just given up. I ask them what else I can take and they come back to say “if you can’t take these, there’s nothing I can do for you.” Soooo Doc, how can heal this? I get crickets when I ask.
Right now this another worry I have to deal while trying to not panic. For 90% of life’s problems, there is a solution right? That’s what I am trying to tell myself because while I have to tackle this problem, I first have to deal with the dizziness and weakness that intensified today, most likely due to the fact that I was exhausted mentally and physically yesterday and decided to sleep on that neck crushing pillow earlier worsening my subluxation.
Today, my brother brought down yet another pillow I had in the closet and we will see if this one is less damaging to my neck/spine. Let me tell you, I have purchased soo many pillows in the past year that I could open my own store at this point!!!
I’m starting to think that maybe I should just get a pillow I have never gotten before like a down feather pillow maybe? It’s an option but I’d have to physically go and purchase one because some are known to give off an odor and that would definitely suck if I got a stinky one.
For now, I’m doing some breathing exercises which calm me down and prevent me from going down anxiety road. Box breathing works well, as well as ocean breath. I also have an inspirational quote I printed out after my dear friend Susan insisted I put it up as motivation and a reminder that I will be going to Comic Con. She knows how much NYCC means to me as it is the only time a year I get to just unwind, unplug my mind from worry and stress and just immerse myself in nerd heaven. I don’t take vacations, or go anywhere…this is the only time I feel sheer bliss and total euphoria, visiting artists alley, sitting in on panels of tv shows or comic books, getting dressed up, seeing others in costume, and perusing the endless booths of trinkets, artwork, comic books, clothing that Comic Con has.
On a positive note, I have not used the cane in a few days and have not used the walker since last week so that’s definitely a step in the right direction. Have to remember to be as patient as possible with myself and keep going. Hopefully tomorrow I can fit more movement exercises!
Until next time my phoenixes. Baby steps are fine as long as you keep going!!
Mind Body Synergylia 