The week of Thanksgiving, I had an endoscopy and last week I got the test results via the doctor’s office portal. The test results ruled out Erosive Esophagitis which is what I thought I had based on the intense pain I have been experiencing even when I drink water. They also ruled out H-Pylori (awesome!), celiac disease (I knew this would be the case), and the polyp was benign (yay!) But the tests did show that the Squamo-columnar mucosa, showed focal intestinal metaplasia and mild acute and chronic inflammation consistent with Barrett’s Esophagus (FUDGE!) Now Barrett’s is classified as a pre-cancerous condition where the esophageal cells change to resemble intestinal tissue, basically a change in the cellular structure of the lining in your esophagus which if untreated may lead to cancer. For the millions of people who have Barrett’s, a majority never develop cancer after treatment. Now, I did cry a few times when I read these results, but thanks to my Wellness Coach/Guru/Yoda/Yoga Goddess/friend Mary, I implemented the tapping method she taught me and was able to calm down to a point of say. “MEH okay, let’s see what the doctor says” and cried no more.
Today I had the virtual appointment with my Gastroenterologist. She said that while the lab results do point to Barrett’s Esophagus, she is not 100 percent sure I have this. I can’t remember fully her explanation, (I blame peri-menopause here) but it had to do with the fact that there were various tissue samples taken from different areas (the esophagus, stomach and duodenum) so from that I deduce that maybe they mixed them up or something else? I don’t know. But the chronic inflammation definitely can be a contributing factor to Barrett’s. She did go on to say that even if I do have it which can be confirmed in my next endoscopy next year, that likeliness of developing cancer is very low.
This is comforting of course and we are playing it by ear to see how long I will be taking the PPI for to heal my esophagus and get rid of the pain when I eat. But, all of this pain and latest diagnosis could have been prevented had the doctors who saw me in past years listened to me and taken action.
The first gastro I saw when my symptoms were getting bad was someone whose name I cannot remember. He is the one that prescribed the most powerful antibiotics to wipe out all good and bad bacteria to basically reset my IBS. No recommendation to get an endoscopy or colonoscopy to take a look and see what’s up. He just seemed at a loss. As luck would have it, I decided not take those little poison pills after going to the Museum of Natural History and seeing a microbiome and gut health exhibit they had that was an eye opener and I am forever grateful for that.
The next gastro I went to, did recommend a colonoscopy and endoscopy and when he got in there he saw that I had mild gastritis which was stressed induced as it had no other cause like H-Pylori. So I was grateful but didn’t understand really what that meant. He prescribed muscle relaxers or something to that effect that I was to take whenever I felt stressed or anxious. I never took those either because that wasn’t really addressing anything in my opinion, so I just tried to get rid of the stress which was like climbing up a an escalator going down. When I went back to him in 2022 he found mild esophagitis in addition to the gastritis I already had. I asked him if there was anything I needed to take to heal this and he said no, basically I should be fine. I wanted to ask more questions, but he couldn’t get me out of that office fast enough.
A year later I went to an arrogant ascot of a man who did ask if I had an endoscopy/colonoscopy when I told him my symptoms and pleaded with him to help and showed him the test results and then when I informed him of other things I had like IBS, he closed his notebook and sternly told me “Well, IBS is different for everybody RIGHT?” He then prescribed cholesterol pills even though I don’t have cholesterol issues because “It will cause constipation which will help you IBS-D (Diarrhea) right now. He then shoved a paper with a Fodmap diet list in my hand and told me to follow it. I have tried those things time and again with no success because I have gastritis and esophagitis you moldy muffin!! (I wish I said this but I was too deflated to even argue)
Another year later, I went to another doctor and she seemed good. She listened and promised to help me and recommended I see their nutritionist. I was prescribed Omeprazole and told to take Reflux Gourmet (a product that uses Alginate to creates a protective coating for the esophagus). Omeprazole, however, gave me depression and I developed a pain on one side of my throat every time I swallowed. The Reflux Gourmet? Well that messed up my stomach. The nutritionist when I told her everything I was doing, just told me to keep it up. She did order 12 vials of blood to check levels of all vitamins which I appreciate, but other than that it was an expensive waste of time. As far as the doctor? I tried to contact her office not only to tell her of the side effects I was experiencing, but to ask her what else I could take. What else I could do? I got nothing but crickets. So back to square one.
Fast forward to a few months ago, and I went to another gastroenterologist who was recommended by another doctor and she told me that my esophagitis wasn’t damaging and that she doesn’t tell half her patients they have gastritis because this is a nervous system issue. She told me to take Reflux Gourmet which I already did before and it messed up my stomach but I had forgotten. I didn’t even argue, I was just soo disappointed I agreed to take that and left.
All these doctors and no one was able to help. All these doctors with limited knowledge and desire to think outside the box to help a patient that is paying for their services. This is the part that frustrates me the most. Thinking about the past 6 years now since being diagnosed with gastritis, and 3 years since I was diagnosed with esophagitis and the years that followed. All the drinks like coffee, hot chocolate, teas, pumpkin lattes I could not have or the foods I could no longer eat like chocolate, pumpkin pie, apple pie, cinnamon anything as well as lemon, oranges or anything citrus not to mention any products containing citric acid in them.
All of this pain and suffering could have been prevented if they would have listened. If they would have taken the time to do their job instead of calling it a day and sending me on my way. With all of this in mind, I wrote a respectful letter to all four doctors and sent them out today. Summarizing my journey and how they all failed to help me. I ended each letter with the quote from a scene from the Golden Girls where Dorothy confronts Dr Budd, the doctor who dismissed her when she came in with debilitating fatigue that ended up being Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. It’s a two part episode in Season 5 and I truly feel that many doctors should be required to watch before they graduate med school.
Sending these letters in a Christmas card were cathartic and gives me much needed closure on that frustration that I feel. That resentment that I had for not getting the help I asked for. I don’t hate them. Hate takes too much energy. I am disappointed in them though and I do hope these doctor’s do better for their future patients.
Now, I can focus on healing truly this time, getting stronger and enjoying life the way I deserve to…by living it the best I can. Until next time my phoenixes. Never Give Up on yourself. You deserve the best care and you need to be your own health advocate. Keep fighting to get healthy if you have any health struggles my phoenixes and let go of the negative whenever you can. I leave you with that quote from Golden Girl Dorothy and the youtube clip of that scene. Stay strong my phoenixes!
Dorothy Zbornak: “I don’t know where you doctors lose your humanity, but you lose it. You know, if all of you at the beginning of your careers could get very sick and very scared for a while, you’d probably learn more from that than from anything else. You better start listening to your patients. They need to be heard. They need caring, they need compassion. They need attending to. You know, someday, Dr. Budd, you’re going to be on the other side of the table. And as angry as I am, and as angry as I always will be, I still wish you a better doctor than you were to me“
Mind Body Synergylia 