The past few days have been interesting to say the least. Last Friday I left after work and went downtown to do a little Christmas shopping, then with heavy cumbersome bags (heavy for me is anything between 5 and 10 pounds) I walked over to Trader Joe’s to get some cocoa powder I needed to make cookies.
Saturday I spent all day making biscotti, buttery sable cookies, then vanilla and chocolate sables to make checkerboard cookies. While I was not able to make it to my friend’s house on Sunday, I did send her a cookie tin filled with the goodies I made.
Yesterday, after work, I made my way downtown again to check out Five Below after seeing a lot of videos on Instagram of possible stocking stuffers I could get. While I didn’t find much other than two books for me on gut health, I was elated I was able to go outside again. Not only was I able to walk around, when I came home, I did my laundry! It was about 7:30pm and I actually had the energy to do my laundry!! Usually by that time I’m spent and just want to put my feet up and melt into the couch.
Today, during my lunch hour, I went to the post office, then went to the store and picked up some more wrapping paper, tape and a few other items we need for Christmas. I came back home to work and while waiting for some emails to come through I started wrapping presents. Once 5:30pm hit, I figured I’d finished wrapping all of my presents and then began to cook dinner. After dinner I baked off the rest of the vanilla sable cookies that were in the freezer!!!!!!!!!!!
Why does all of this seemingly easy, mundane stuff make me excited? Because a few months ago I could barely walk, had to use a walker and had to sit down quickly because I was winded, dizzy and wobbly. A few months ago I was diagnosed with hypertonic pelvic floor muscles that forced me to stop exercising. A few months ago I was also told I had low D3 and was diagnosed with deconditioning (muscle wasting) due to inactivity from numerous injuries I sustained since the end of 2023. Then most recently the intense pain from the esophagitis which is now Barrett’s or so show the lab results (my doctor is still not 100 percent convinced I have it which is good.) Not only that, all these things I have been doing in a single day, I would just do one of in a day and celebrate that.
All of these issues led me to be exhausted, weak and left me with the inability to do much like go up and down stairs, walk for more than 3 blocks and lift my laptop or even move my bed. Not to mention the hot flashes from the perimenopause keeping me up at night. Fast forward to these past few days and I have been on FIRE!!! I have taken advantage of the energy and stepped outside to walk around and get things done or just to feel the air in my face.
Granted, my calves are in mild pain, my back is killing me and my shoulders have knots on top of knots that hurt, but is this stopping me? Is this bringing me down? NO WAY! I can deal with these pains because I have done so before and it’s nothing a good massage and rest can’t help.
Maybe it’s the magic of the holiday season, or maybe it’s the positive affirmations I have been doing this month that are helping, or maybe I really am starting to grow a little bit of muscle again. Or maybe it’s all of these things!!!
No matter what, I am thrilled that I have been able to do soo much and have had energy to spare up until I sit down on the couch at least and then my body goes bye bye into sleep land.
Whatever the reason, if there is anything that I have learned in regards to my body is to take advantage of the days I have energy. And each day is different for me. So I have learned in these past few weeks to turn off that belittling, negative voice and give myself grace on the days that my body is wiped out and grab the bull by the horns when my body is full of energy. It’s taken me a long time to get here and I keep repeating the same thing but having a wellness coach help me through this was key. Having groups I am a part of like the Warrior Tai Chi Group and the Goddess Circle and of course my brother and mom are essential to keeping me here at this state of positivity in addition to my desire and drive to get better.
I know that I will still have days where things won’t go right, or I will get news much like recently with the pre-diabetes result of the bloodwork (which incidentally can happen if you have a sedentary lifestyle) but I will deal with these things as they come and implement what I learned from my friend and Wellness Coach Mary Walker Golden
Sometimes getting to where you need to be can take a while. You can veer off the path due to soo many reasons, but if you keep trying and ask for help when needed, you will eventually get to where you need to be, or figure out what you want and make a plan to get there.
I know what my plan is now and it is vastly different than the one envisioned for myself fresh out of college, but this is better. I have a long ways to go, but I’m finally on the right track.
Until next time, my phoenixes. For those who celebrated Hannukah, I hope you had 8 amazing days. Merry Christmas and Happy Kwanzaa for those that celebrate. Don’t give up on yourself. Keep Going! You never know what tomorrow may bring. Repeat after me, “Something good will happen to me tomorrow”, I will feel better than I do today. I am safe, I am important.”
Mind Body Synergylia 